Honesty is always good, except when it's better to lie.

What happened to your tan?"--Fang "It was dirt." --Max

Is that clear?" said Borcht "as clear as pea soup" I said

People always remember the worst day of their lifes. It becomes a part of them forever.

I'm going to introduce BookShots, which are these under-150-page books that I'm launching, and they're under $5. They just launched in Australia. I already had a ton of content, but now add 50 books a year of content.

The hardest part about parenting is when I have to be The Dad--aka the Fun-Sucker--as opposed to being a friend.

Okay, if this is what falling in love feels like, someone please kill me now. (Not literally, overzealous readers.) But it was all too much - too much emotion, too much happiness, too much longing, perhaps too much ice cream.