I write humor the way a surgeon operates, because it is a livelihood, because I have a great urge to do it, because many interesting challenges are set up, and because I have the hope it may do some good.

Some American writers who have known each other for years have never met in the daytime or when both were sober.

The wit makes fun of other persons; the satirist makes fun of the world; the humorist makes fun of himself.

There are two kinds of light - the glow that illuminates, and the glare that obscures.

There is something about a poet which leads us to believe that he died, in many cases, as long as 20 years before his birth.

Until a man can quit talking loudly to himself in order to shout down the memories of blunderings and gropings, he is in no shape for the painstaking examination of distress.

Somebody has said that woman's place is in the wrong. That's fine. What the wrong needs is a woman's presence and a woman's touch. She is far better equipped than men to set it right.