I actually was class clown, but I don't know how that happened because I've never been considered an outwardly funny person-as the people in this room will attest.

Sex is the quickest way to ruin a friendship.

Listening to your tape, I was reminded of this poem. It has the central question: Is it harder to count on someone or to know that you're being the one counted upon? Anyway, there's this part that goes: if equal affection cannot be, then let the more loving one be me. Have you ever read that one? It's one of my favorites.

As you can tell from watching the show, I'm not a strong joke writer per se.

You can tell a lot about a person by how excited they are to do the Macarena.

I feel like the American people are being lied to and manipulated. President Bush is trying to force 9/11 and Saddam together.

I'm grateful for any opportunity to act.