It's been hard in entertainment as a 45-year-old woman to find jobs. They get fewer and far between if you're older, unless you're one of the few lucky ones who work constantly, like Meryl Streep.

Taking into account the public's regrettable lack of taste, it is incumbent upon you not to fit in.

Nothing translates worse than comedy into the printed word.

Iraq is a manufactured conflict for the sake of geopolitical dominance in the area.

You know, I've had Botox. The woman who does it is very good, obviously. Very conservative.

Should have dogs before they have kids. Everybody.

When I see the American flag, I go, 'Oh my God, you're insulting me.'