Men are allowed to age. Men are allowed to gain weight. Men are allowed to be quirky looking.

Listen, young people, I understand narcissism - clearly. But at least I have the decency to hate myself. And that's what's missing from the young people. They don't have the debilitating self-loathing and the second guessing.

Sage advice? If you're drunk, stay away from the phone. You can't get the answering machine message back.

The reason a person is a republican is because something is wrong with them. Again, that's science - that's neuroscience. You cannot be well adjusted, open-minded, pluralistic, enlightened and be a republican.

You know, I've had Botox. The woman who does it is very good, obviously. Very conservative.

Iraq is a manufactured conflict for the sake of geopolitical dominance in the area.

I'm not religious anymore, but I think it's like papal infallibility, which is a ridiculous man-made tenet, like what I believe most religious tenets to be, are man-made after the fact.