I met a real looker. He picked me up at the two dollar slot machines, so you know he's no cheapskate." Grandma Mazur

If I gave you a pity position it wouldn't be in my office.

Almost everybody I know has died,” Grandma said. “Bunch of wimps.

I wasn’t a fabulous cook. I didn’t have a boyfriend, much less a husband. And I wasn’t a big financial success. I could live with all those failings as long as I knew that once in a while I looked really hot.

He's going to jail. He can't see. He can't hear. He can't take a leak that lasts under fifteen minutes. But he has an erection and all the other problems are small change. Next time around I'm coming back as a man. Priorities are clearly defined. Life is simple.

Happens to me all the time...People are always underestimating my dumbness.

I'm for sure a workaholic. I'm a complete control freak and I take on way too many projects.