Why do you give me cars?" "It's fun," Ranger said."And it keeps you safe. Do you want to know why keeping you safe is important to me?" "You love me?" "Yes." A sigh inadvertently escaped. "We're really screwed up, aren't we?" "In a very large way," Ranger said.

Maybe your pregnant. Oops, hold on, you're not pregnant, on account of you're not gettin any.

Stop the planet. I want to get off.

It was dark and raining, with bad visibility, but this was Jersey, and we don't slow down for anything.

I like my nuts," Mooner said. "I don't want them cut off. I'd be, like, nutless then.

It was a weird sensation. Like getting caught eavesdropping, or lying, or sitting on the toilet and having the bathroom walls suddenly drop away.

Is that a bulletproof vest? See, now that's so insulting. That's like saying I'm not smart enough to shoot you in the head." Eddie DeChooch