We don't usually write up accidents involving rabbits. - Joe Morelli

Get me a gun. If I don't go into labor soon, I'm going to shoot myself. And pass the gravy. Pass it now." Valerie - To the Nines

Concentrate on doing the job, not the fear.

I make lots of mistakes. I try hard not to make the same mistake more than three or four times.

That's one of the things I like about Mary Lou. She's willing to believe the worst about anyone.

Calories don’t count if they’re connected to a celebration. Everyone knows this.

I failed math twice, never fully grasping probability theory. I mean, first off, who cares if you pick a black ball or a white ball out of the bag? And second, if you’re bent over about the color, don’t leave it to chance. Look in the damn bag and pick the color you want.