Sixty years ago this week Hitler invaded Poland. This led to the creation of The History Channel.

Martha Stewart published her recipe for disaster -- mix one part arrogance with two parts incompetence, simmer in the juices and then serve hot in the can.

President Bush said this Iraq situation looks like 'the rerun of a bad movie.' Well sure, there's a Bush in the White House, the economy's going to hell, we're going to war over oil. I've seen this movie, haven't I?

President Bush fell off his bicycle this weekend and you know what was really sad? It's a stationary bike.

They were going crazy in Kansas. People were up to 9 p.m. I think that was the greatest thing to happen to Kansas since the eradication of the boll weevil.

A survey asked married women when they most want to have sex. 84 per cent of them said right after their husband is finished.

First there's the promise ring, then the engagement ring, then the wedding ring... soon after... comes Suffer...ring!