Yesterday Gary Condit spent the whole day attending an agricultural meeting. Boy, that's when you know a congressman's in real trouble: when he spends the whole day actually working.

John Kerry now getting slammed by the Republicans because of a botched joke he did about President Bush and Iraq in a recent speech. Kerry was stunned about this. He said, 'What? People are listening to my speeches?'

Political experts are saying the reason John Kerry is doing so well is because he's 'electable.' Hey, so was Al Gore - in fact, he even got elected and it didn't help him at all.

The leaders of the Taliban said today that killing bin Laden won't solve the problem. But, you know, it couldn't hurt.

We pick politicians by how they look on TV and Miss America on where she stands on the issues. Isn't that a little backwards?

Well, the big story -- Hillary Clinton will be running for president in 2008. You know why I think she's running? I think she finally wants to see what it's like to sleep in the president's bed.

Did you see those Iraqis making that pilgrimage slashing their foreheads with knives and whipping their backs with chains. See, when Saddam Hussein was around they weren't allowed to make that pilgrimage. If they tried that with Saddam Hussein, he would have slashed their foreheads with knives and whipped their backs with chains.