Today is April 1, April Fools' Day, a day that people try to fool their friends and relatives. Don't confuse that with April 15, when people try to fool the IRS.

The Senate is now considering increasing government subsidies for corn growers to produce more ethanol. If we produce enough ethanol we can postpone our next invasion of a Middle Eastern country for two to three years.

You know, it shows how old I am. I can remember the good old days when the president picked the Supreme Court justices instead of the other way around.

It looks like Rudy Giuliani is out of the race. Finally, a Republican with an exit strategy.

Arnold Schwarzenegger is blaming man for global warming. And today, Al Gore agreed with him. That's so typical. Two cyborgs, 'Oh, let's blame the humans.'

With high definition TV, everything looks bigger and wider. Kind of like going to your 25th high school reunion.

Another air traffic controller fell asleep on the job, but he had a good excuse. He was watching President Obama’s deficit speech.