You know what Arnold Schwarzenegger and Meg Whitman have in common? They both got in trouble for stiffing the maid.

President Bush said global warming is happening much quicker than he thought, and then his staff pulled him aside and said 'It's just springtime.'

Tonight the Republican presidential candidates had a big debate, 10 candidates. The last time that many rich white guys got together, I think Exxon merged with Mobil.

A Democratic congressman said that he worries that the IRS scandal might have a chilling effect on the IRA and that they might be afraid to audit people. So finally some good is coming out of all of this.

The longest-serving Republican Senator, Alaska's Ted Stevens, found guilty just a few hours ago on all charges in his corruption trial. Do you know this story? He failed to report he had some work done on his house. Yeah, here's the bad part. You know who did the work? Joe the plumber. Unlicensed.

Show business pays you a lot of money, because eventually you’re gonna get screwed.

President Bush spoke with the Amish. He didn't want to, but it was the only group he could find that wasn't upset about the high price of gas.