U.N. officials said today they desperately need $7 billion to help people cope with disasters, but they're having a hard time getting people to send rescue money. Here's what the UN should do: Invest in bad mortgages, run a bank into the ground, give yourself a bonus, get some spa treatments and, in no time, the government will send you $750 billion.
Jay LenoSarah Palin has admitted she tried marijuana several years ago, but she did not like it. She said it distorted her perceptions, impaired her thinking, and she's hoping that the effects will eventually wear off.
Jay LenoIn Chicago some anti-Mitt Romney protesters told reporters they're being paid to protest. They said they're being paid by Democrats to stand outside and chant anti-Romney slogans. Well, who says President Obama isn't creating any new jobs?
Jay LenoPresident Obama announced this week that he is going to start sending out his own messages personally on Twitter. And today Anthony Weiner said, โItโs a trap, donโt do it!โ But President Obamaโs tweets are a little different than Anthony Weinerโs. When Obama sends out pictures of something obscene, itโs the unemployment numbers.
Jay Leno