President Bush announced tonight that he believes in democracy and that democracy can exist in Iraq. They can have a strong economy, they can have a good health care plan, and they can have a free and fair voting. Iraq? We can't even get this in Florida.
Jay LenoJohn Kerry met with Ralph Nader last week. Both sides of every issue were discussed. And then, Nader spoke.
Jay LenoOne of the Taliban spokesmen said they have thousands of men who look forward to death like Americans look forward to living, which is great because we can arrange that. We'll set them up with death, we'll continue living.
Jay LenoPresident James Garfield could write in Latin with one hand while writing in Greek with the other. I would give my right arm to be ambidextrous.
Jay Leno