Yesterday President Obama said, 'We can't continue to treat tax money like monopoly money.' Oh really - how come all those guys on Wall Street got 'get out of jail free' cards?

We are in a code orange. Homeland Security said earlier today that everyone should have a roll of duct tape and plastic sheeting to protect your house in event of terrorist attacks. Who came up with this idea? MacGyver?

President Bush appeared with Arnold Schwarzenegger at a huge campaign event. Only in California can a governor who speaks German and a president who can barely speak English try to make themselves clear to an audience that's primarily Spanish.

John Kerry was the big winner in Iowa. Ted Kennedy introduced Kerry as the 'comeback kid.' That used to be Bill Clinton's name - because every time he would come back to a city, he would find out if he had a kid or not.

President Bush said it's now time for a change in Iraq and he wants them to have a Western-style democracy like ours. So right now in Iraq, the economy is collapsing, businessmen are corrupt, and Hussein wants his son to take over as president. Sounds like mission accomplished.

Gray Davis got some good news this week: the Clintons are out here in California campaigning for him. Actually, Hillary is campaigning for Davis, Bill is out here for Larry Flynt.

They had a profile of John Kerry on the news and they said his first wife was worth around $300 million and his second wife, his current wife, is worth around $700 million. So when John Kerry says he's going after the wealthy in this country, he's not just talking. He's doing it!