I don't know if you've ever been to England, but as soon as they find out you're from America, they hate you. They just think they're more sophisticated than we are. They're so pissed at us. You know what it is? They're mad because they lost the Revolutionary War, and they should be because there was only like nine of us.

You know how to tell if the teacher is hung over? Movie Day.

I wasn't the guy everyone liked. I was the guy that wouldn't shut up.

The anxiety is, "Are they going to come?" and when you get there and it's full you say, "I'm good. I can stop freaking out." But when it's four days out and they're scrambling to find more radio shows and Good Morning Phoenix and all these weird shows, then that gets very tiring.

I think I made a mistake once... yeah... it was only once.

When I'm home I'm in much more of a routine like I said, which I like. On the road everything gets flip-flopped.

I was the youngest kid on my street, the youngest comic in the clubs. I always felt like I was playing catch-up. I was very angry.