I tried, it was hard, I quit, the end. Story of my life.

Despite my best efforts, I'm not quite perfect. Let's just say I'm like one of those Hopi blankets where they leave a tiny flaw so as to not affront the Lord.

I can't believe anyone would voluntarily run 26 miles. Sometimes I sit on the couch cross-legged because I don't feel like walking to the bathroom.

I tried, it was hard, I quit, the end. Story of my life.

Owning a dog is slightly less expensive than being addicted to crack.

I still believe in the Holy Trinity, except now it's Target, Trader Joe's, and IKEA.

Expressing political opinion can be a powerful way to establish a character's voice when writing fiction.