I had no idea how complicated and solitary it could be to write a simple book.

Knock-knock, motherfucker.

That night I looked up at those same stars, but I didn't want any of those things. I didn't want Egypt, or France, or far-flung destinations. I just wanted to go back to my life from my childhood, just to visit it, and touch it, and to convince myself that yes, it had been real.

When Hailey was born my first thought was that I needed a drink and that hospitals should have bars in them.

Pretty much everyone hates high school. It's a measure of your humanity, I suspect. If you enjoyed high school, you were probably a psychopath or a cheerleader. Or possibly both. Those things aren't mutually exclusive, you know. I've tried to block out the memory of my high school years, but no matter how hard you try, it's always with you, like an unwanted hitchhiker. Or herpes. I assume.

Like books, the Internet has saved my life. It helped me recognize that so many people I adore suffer from the same things I do.

A hug is like a strangle you haven't finished yet.