What would the world be like if people said whatever they were thinking, all the time, whenever it came to them? How long would a blind date last? About 13 seconds, I think. Oh, sorry, your rear end is too big. That's ok, your breath stinks anyway. See you later.
Jerry SeinfeldWhy would you want to work for a living if you could just joke around? Being a celebrity expands your commercial possibilities.
Jerry SeinfeldI know I'm not going to understand women. I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax, pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root, and still be afraid of a spider.
Jerry Seinfeld