The average pregnant woman farts 15 times that!

First love is only once in a lifetime, and it remains only in memory.

To be my man, you have to put up with a lot. I toot under the sheets, I spend a lot of money and I can belch the ABCs.

There are certain things that make me relax, like writing my journal. That's the only time that I'm relaxing. It's the only time I really get to examine myself.

This week it's peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, toasted. And then, I'll put some salt on my hand like I'm taking a tequila shot and then take a bite of the sandwich.

For Thanksgiving we have to make a Tofurkey! It doesn't sound right! It's gonna be jiggly and weird.

There's tons of little tricks that that go into making the perfect shoe, but I think color, comfort is really important and different sizes of heels.