If you aren't in the moment, you are either looking forward to uncertainty, or back to pain and regret.

Life is an ordeal, albeit an exciting one, but I wouldn't trade it for the good old days of poverty and obscurity.

There is a huge difference between a dog that is going to eat you in your mind and an actual dog that's going to eat you.

Movies are great, but the real romance happens right here, somewhere - real close-up. I really couldn't have done it if I hadn't been through a lot one way or another. Either you're the one erasing or you're the one being erased, so it's not a pleasant feeling!

My social life goes in bursts, where I get like, "Oh, I gotta get out and do something, man, I gotta do something." And I'll plan a trip and go on a motorcycle trip down the Baja Peninsula for 900 miles and I'll hang out with my friends for like a month, and then they'll never see me for two months or three months or whatever, and I won't answer any calls.

I don't feel any pressure to be funny at all. I'm funny because I want to be funny. I could sit here and be serious for an hour and you would go away and make me much funnier than I am.

Always turn your wheel in the direction of the skid.