Babies should be classified as an antidepressant. It's pretty hard to be in a bad mood around a 5-month-old baby.
That's my private business. Besides, the perception is that people that believe in God are stupid.
Comedians rarely have writers, and if you do it's usually a sign of laziness.
My goal in life is to be as happy as a studio audience.
Deep frying a Twinkie makes it healthy, right?
Weight Watchers says nothing tastes better than thin feels. I can think of a thousand things that taste better than thin feels.