Just heard Paul Scholes has retired, best I’ve ever played against by a mile. Most technically gifted player in english history. Legend.

Sitting eating sushi in the city, incredibly chilled out reading Nietzsche.

How I wish the mass media had christened me Joe instead of Joey. I hate Joey, not going to lie. Nobody I respect calls me it.

England did nothing in that World Cup, so why were they bringing books out? 'We got beat in the quarter-finals. I played like s**t. Here's my book.'

Messi is the best that's played the game. Streets ahead of Maradona.

He couldn't put on a coaching session to save his life. I've spoken to people about him and he can barely lay out cones.

Javier Pastore wouldn't get a beach ball off me if we were locked in a phone box. He's turd. Anyone who thinks he isn't is clueless.