When you've been doing comedy for forty years, you really do know most of the jokes. And even if you don't know a specific joke, you can pretty much guess what it's going to be.

I've always called myself a writer/performer, not an actor because I basically write what I perform.

I think the problem with people like this is that they are so stupid that they have no idea how stupid they are.

My hovercraft is full of eels.

And now for something completely different...

What I've always wanted to do is be as funny as possible.

Telling people how to be creative is easy - being creative is difficult.