At some point we all look up and realize we are lost in a maze.

I figured something out. The future is unpredictable.

I told myself – as I’ve told myself before – that the body shuts down when the pain gets too bad, that consciousness is temporary, that this will pass. But just like always, I didn’t slip away. I was left on the shore with the waves washing over me, unable to drown.

But monotony doesn't make for painlessness.

Everything's uglier close up," she said. "Not you," I answered.

I shaved this morning for precisely that reason. I was like, 'Well, you never know when someone is going to clamp down on your calf and try to suck out the snake poison.

It's fine," I repeated. And whatever. It was fine. It had to be.