I love Stephen Colbert and Jon Stewart because they're bringing irony back into American humor, which is a delicious treat. The entire Colbert persona of being extreme right-wing when he's not at all is highly amusing. He does it so well, but sometimes a little too well. My wife is convinced he's completely that way.

When you grew up like me and my four brothers, you end up feeling somewhat inadequate, like somehow you don't count.

Having a birthday cake squashed into your face by young kids? Delicious. I always don a Santa suit at Christmas. Remaining childish is a tremendous state of innocence.

I've never said I'm a communist.

I love being alive so much. When you come out of comas in your childhood, every moment awake is a joyous occasion.

I like crazy people, especially those who don't see the risk.

I have one major problem with the Internet: It's full of liars.