I've realized you can use a fork as a spoon if you use it rapidly enough.

My fear is that I go up to the girl of my dreams and say 'I'm sorry, but I've got to say hello to you,' and she slides the stool back and gets up and walks away, saying, 'Not for me, Bub. I don't want anything to do with you.'

I am tempted to keep the car in drive, And leave it all behind...

You should have a picture of yourself as a kid in your home so that you remember where you came from.

I have male fans, but I'm persuading them to become female!

I am beginning to know what it feels like to be a woman. To have people looking at you all the time. And I'm sorry ladies, I had no idea! But people are looking at me all the time. It's like I have musical boobies!

I get recognized somewhere in between like local meteorologist and national meteorologist.