George Bernard Shaw writes like a Pakistani who has learned English when he was twelve years old in order to become an accountant.

I never deliberately set out to shock, but when people don't walk out of my plays I think there is something wrong.

The schoolteacher is certainly underpaid as a childminder, but ludicrously overpaid as an educator.

Censorship is the commonest social blasphemy because it is mostly concealed, built into us by indolence, self-interest and cowardice.

Royalty is the gold filling in a mouthful of decay

Asking a writer what he thinks about criticism is like asking a lamppost what it feels about dogs.

Go on - but don't think you can kill my confidence. I've had experts doing it for years.