If the universe is bigger and stranger than I can imagine, it's best to meet it with an empty bladder.

The original sin of Republicans is greed. Everyone understands greed. Everybody wants to get theirs. The original sin of Democrats is pity. Greed is more attractive, and a better motivator, than pity.

As a reader, I have a very short attention span and a low tolerance for boredom, and I find that comes in handy with my writing. If I get bored writing something, I pity the people who will then try to read it.

If your social consciousness seems stuck in 1975, 2014 is gonna be a rough ride.

Christianity is a fine religion and I wish more Christians practiced it.

I am not responsible for actions of the imaginary version of me you have inside your head.

I don't care whether I really exist or don't, whether I'm real or fictional. What I want right now is to be the person who decides my own fate.