A lot of stand-up comedy guys, when they get a little famous, just give up their stand-up career, and it cancels out the thing that set them apart.

Doctors have told me I have a high pain threshold, but I can only know what I feel. I think I'm good at minimising the pain and being indifferent to it.

I feel like my eyes have gonorrhea.

What an honor that Stephen Prouty got nominated for best makeup and hairstyling for Jackass Presents Bad Grandpa. Am I as stunned as everyone else we didn’t get the nod for best picture? Well of course, duh, but I won’t let that take away from my happiness for Steve, Tony Gardner, and our whole makeup team. Wahoo!

I think everyone roots for the underdog.

I was a really bad kid. Then, I got sweet as I got older.

It's a real primal thing, watching someone get hurt. It's funny and accessible.