Wait a minute! Wait a minute! I figured this out. I know what's wrong with what we've done in Iraq. We've been following time as it goes forward. What a classic mistake. Linear time is so pre-9-11.

9/11 references are like Lay's potato chips...no Congress can make just one.

Some people look at a glass and see it as half-full. Others look at a glass and call it a dragon.

I'm not trying to be modest of self-deprecating or in any way trying to do that.

We are, if anything - I do believe we function as a sort of editorial cartoon. That we are a digestive process, like so many other digestive processes that go on.

And try as I might, I am having difficulty giving a f**k.

Gay people can't be proud of the country and want to defend it too. What's the army afraid is going to happen if gay people are in it. Private, shoot that man! I can't, he's adorable.