It's nice to know that [God] can destroy us in a myriad of ways.

There's nothing like a shipwreck to spark the imagination of everyone who was not on that specific ship.

If your regime is not strong enough to handle a joke, then you don't have a regime.

61% of graduating teens have had sex, 37% will eventually have sex, and 2% become statisticians.

The bias of the mainstream media is toward sensationalism, conflict, and laziness.

Although to be fair, cherry picking isn't quite what we do. Cherries are sweet and delicious. What we do is more turd mining. And I'll thank you to give our work the respect it deserves!

I think that's why they're so really - here's the disconnect. It's sort of this odd and I've always had this problem with the rationality of it. That the President [George W.Bush] says, "We are in the fight for a way of life. This is the greatest battle of our generation, and of the generations to come. "And, so what I'm going to do is you know, Iraq has to be won, or our way of life ends, and our children and our children's children all suffer. So, what I'm gonna do is send 10,000 more troops to Baghdad."