Jonah Quotes

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Forty more days and Nineveh will be overthrown.

Jonah

Don't walk next to me, it looks gay.

Jonah

What is more likely? That tomorrow will be called 'Thursday' or that Maxine Waters will play the race card in her ethics investigation?

Jonah

You're coming to Buzzfeed's homepage not for yourself, but to find something to share with someone else.

Jonah

It would be better for me to die than to live.

Jonah

Nutrition is not a private matter!

Jonah

And the Lord God prepared a plant and made it come up over Jonah, that it might be shade for his head to deliver him from his misery. So Jonah was very grateful for the plant.

Jonah

You are a gracious God and merciful, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love.

Jonah

Go to the great city of Nineveh and preach against it, because its wickedness has come up before me.

Jonah

Itโ€™s just this sense that you got something to say.

Jonah

The Nazis played the same games against Jews that todayโ€™s left plays against 'Eurocentrism,' 'whiteness,' and 'logocentrism.' When you hear a campus radical denounce 'white logic' or 'male logic,' she is standing on the shoulders of a Nazi who denounced 'Jewish logic' and the 'Hebrew disease'...The white man is the Jew of liberal fascism.

Jonah

Go to the great city of Nineveh and proclaim to it the message I give you.

Jonah

Gov. Christie says 'New Jersey First.' State-based Isolationism!

Jonah

Isnโ€™t this what I said, Lord, when I was still at home? That is what I tried to forestall by fleeing to Tarshish. I knew that you are a gracious and compassionate God, slow to anger and abounding in love, a God who relents from sending calamity. 3 Now, Lord, take away my life, for it is better for me to die than to live.

Jonah

One upside of the heat. Kind of cool to see a cat pant.

Jonah

Is it right for you to be angry?

Jonah

They don't understand that I'm just choosing to be dumb. I'm not dumb. I'm just choosing not to be smart at the moment, but if I put in effort, then I could be really smart, but I choose not to.

Jonah

People think that once you're in movies your life changes in a crazy way. It really doesn't. If you choose to have it change in a crazy way, it will. I have my same groups of friends I was friends with in high school. We're all a bunch of really normal guys.

Jonah

We're not going to get the jack-booted thugs stomping on a human face that you get in '1984' but we might get the 'Brave New World' where the biggest problem there is how to deal with the fact that everyone is so happy...[W]hat we're going to get is a nanny-type of fascism, if we get one at all...[S]imply because the nanny-state wants to hug you doesn't mean it's not tyrannical if you don't want to be hugged.

Jonah

Research by the Keller Fay Group finds that only 7 percent of word-of-mouth happens online.

Jonah

People are racist to us, sir, so why can't we be racist to rangas?

Jonah

Whatever, man. Scorsese thinks Iโ€™m awesome

Jonah

And Iโ€™m so angry I wish I were dead.

Jonah
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