I have never pretended to be any kind of super-religious kind of man, but I feel very strongly that you can be funny without being dirty.

My paintings and comedy have a lot in common. They are both improvisations based on observation.

As a kid, I always wanted to be lots of things. I was a Walter Mitty type. I wanted to be in the French Foreign Legion, a detective, a doctor, a test pilot with a scarf, a fisherman who hauled in a tremendous marlin after a 12-hour fight.

I was always an observer, even as a child. I could be satisfied to sit in a car for 3 hours and just look at the street go by while my mother went shopping.

I've always been proud of being a Marine. I won't hesitate to defend the Corps.

I know you can be funny without being filthy.

If your ship doesn't come in, swim out to it.