I’m never wrong? Who besides Republican presidents and evil masterminds can say that with a straight face?

Then, like a born and bred asshole, he added to the sheriff, "He writes murder mysteries.

Drink your coffee -- people in Africa are sleeping.

One thing I’ve noticed about getting older, it takes twice as much work to get half the results one formerly achieved by falling out of bed.

You were the first in every way that counted.

I'm a thirty-something gay man with a dodgy heart. I sell books for a living. Who wants to read about that?

He scooped up Victoria practically before she hit the ground, well within the five-second rule. If she'd been a potato chip, he could have still eaten her. Not something I particularly wanted to contemplate.