I shouldn't have been there. I should never have been born.

I won't be alive so I won't care who finds me.

Why am i here? What's my purpose?

Never question the sanity of a woman who can render you defenseless with a look.

It was her way of saying, "You should kill yourself.

No one else knows I'm alive, which means they won't notice when I'm gone.

What was I afraid of, exactly? What other people would think? I guess, a little. But that wasn't what was stopping me from acting on my feelings. It was the intensity of them. The desire for her. I knew if I gave into it, I'd have to surrender myself completely. I'd lose all control. Everything I knew, everything I was, the walls I'd built up to protect myself all these years would come crashing down. I might get lost in the rubble. Yet, she made me feel alive in a way I'd only ever imagined I could feel. Bells, whistles, music.