To me it's still a greater miracle when a fly flies than when a human being undertakes to do so.

A father's pride, laid on thick, has always made me wish that the fellow had at least experienced some pain during procreation.

The ultimate aim of psychoanalysis is to attribute art to mental weakness, and then to trace the weakness back to the point where, according to analytic dogma, it originated namely, the lavatory.

A great deal of learning can be packed into an empty head.

If by day art is in the service of business, the evenings are devoted to the businessman's enjoyment of it. That is asking a lot of art, but art and the businessman make it work.

Satire that the censor understands is rightly censored.

What torture, this life in society! Often someone is obliging enough to offer me a light, and in order to oblige him I have to fish a cigarette out of my pocket.