When my brother-in-law, BIll Clinton, was elected, he had gay friends. That was a coming out.

[On cloning sheep:] Oh great, just what we need - more sheep.

I want to host a religious show. I'm sure nobody will be wanting the 11 o'clock spot on Sunday morning. I think we should really get some of our own preachers and preach that gay is good. And we'd have a great choir.

Some women can't say the word lesbian... even when their mouth is full of one.

I'm really happy that I was raised Catholic because it's given me years of material.

Whenever a woman describes herself as a 'post-feminist' I picture women lashed to posts. Joan of Arc was an early post-feminist.

A friend of mine said, no matter what I do I always look like an English teacher. She actually said, you still look like a Campbell's Soup kid.