A good listener is not someone with nothing to say. A good listener is a good talker with a sore throat.

a perfectly managed Christmas correct in every detail is, like basted inside seams and letters answered by return, a sure sign of someone who hasn't enough to do.

I am all for people having their heart in the right place; but the right place for a heart is not inside the head.

Does anybody who gave up smoking to save a pound a week have a pound at the end of the week? Not on your life.

Perennials are the ones that grow like weeds, biennials are the ones that die this year instead of next and hardy annuals are the ones that never come up at all.

I wouldn't say when you've seen one Western you've seen the lot; but when you've seen the lot you get the feeling you've seen one.

The easiest way for your children to learn about money is for you not to have any.