A woman gets stretch marks from one of two things. Either she was big and got small or she was small and got big.

There's only winning and losing, and in our society, as in all societies, there's the person that's doing the winning, or there's the person that's facilitating the winning.

Hello?... No I'm sorry no Shaquita here. Well what number did you dial?.. No it's a nine not a seven... Well try it if it doest work call me back we'll figure this thing out.

Just hit the blunt one time and see if it don't change your perception on whats important in your life.

I'm a grown man. I do whatever I feel like doing with my hair. And if for some reason you feel like there's a magnet and you should have something to say to me, then more power to you. I hope you're prepared.

All comedy comes from a dark place.

White people, you did not get a receipt for niggas, you can not return us!