I'll pour you the first one and after that, if you don't have one, it's your own f****** fault. You know where it is.

Laziness has become the chief characteristic of journalism, displacing incompetence.

Education is one thing and instruction, however worthy, necessary and incidentally or monetarily educative, another.

Hangover cure: Rigorous sex, hydration, hot bath, then "go up for half an hour in an open aeroplane. (needless to say, with a non-hungover person at the controls)."

Death has this much to be said for it: You don't have to get out of bed for it. Wherever you happen to be They bring it to you—free.

Growing older, I have lost the need to be political, which means ... the need to be left. I am driven to grudging toleration of the Conservative Party because it is the party of non-politics, of resistance to politics.

Wives and such are constantly filling up any refrigerator they have a claim on, even its ice-compartment, with irrelevant rubbish like food.