It appeared to the Elders that the people here would believe anything about themselves, no matter how preposterous, as long as it was flattering. To make sure of this, they performed an experiment. They put the idea into Earthlings' heads that the whole Universe had been created by one big animal who looked just like them. He sat on a throne with a lot of less fancy thrones all around him. When people died they got to sit on those other thrones forever because they were such close relatives of the Creator. The people down here just ate that up!

Their imaginations were flywheels on the ramshackle machinery of the awful truth.

The biggest laughs are based on the biggest disappointments and the biggest fears.

Where's evil? It's that large part of every man that wants to hate without limit, that wants to hate with God on its side.

Teaching, may I say, is the noblest profession of all in a democracy.

The thing my father was proudest of was the Ayres clock at the intersection of Washington Street and Meridian. That made him so happy. Ayres complained because he wouldn't send them a bill. There was stuff my family had done there - particularly my father and grandfather - that was quite permanent and wonderful.

What good is a planet called Earth, after all, if you own no land?