Everybody knows that the dumbest people in any American university are in the education department, and English after that.

I hope that my ideas attract a lively dialogue, even if my sentences are simple. Simple sentences have always served me well. And I don't use semicolons. It's hard to read anyway, especially for high school kids. Also, I avoid irony, too. I don't like people saying one thing and meaning the other.

That's what my books are, now that I'm a grownup - mosaics of jokes.

He wanted to talk to them, if he could, to discover whether they had truths about life which he had never heard before. Here is what he hoped new truths might do for him: enable him to laugh at his troubles, to go on living, and to keep out of the North Wing of the Midland County General Hospital, which was for lunatics.

Take it moment by moment, and you will find that we are all, as I’ve said before, bugs in amber.

No good at life, but very funny sometimes with the commentary.

It is a very mixed blessing to be brought back from the dead.