A Perl program is correct if it gets the job done before your boss fires you.

This job of playing God is a little too big for me. Nevertheless, someone has to do it, so I'll try my best to fake it.

Lisp has all the visual appeal of oatmeal with fingernail clippings mixed in.

As someone pointed out, you could have an attribute that says 'optimize the heck out of this routine', and your definition of heck would be a parameter to the optimizer.

My arthritic pinkies are already starting to ache just thinking about ||||=.

When I announced the development of Perl 6, I said it was going to be a community design. I designed Perl, myself. It's limited by my own brain power. So I wanted Perl 6 to be a community design.

What is the sound of Perl? Is it not the sound of a wall that people have stopped banging their heads against?