Major fluctuations in weight gain and loss are detrimental to your health and embarrassing to explain to your friends and family.

I could be a millionaire if I knew how to make stuff and wasn't afraid of electricity.

Changing schools and friends is hard on children and can often make them desperate and lonely enough to form closer ties with a sibling.

When shopping at Dunkin' Donuts, pretend you are the mother of nine. Say things like, 'Little David likes cream-filled and Susie wanted jelly.' That way, no one will be suspicious when you order a dozen donuts with one cup of coffee to go.

There are three very good reasons to travel: 1. See the world. 2. Meet new people. 3. Room service.

As we move closer and closer to a nonsexist world, women will have an equal opportunity as men to be rejected, embarrassed, and humiliated beyond all consolation.

Sex is probably the most fun you can have in life without gaining weight or having a hangover the next day.