I'm not raising the children, I'm raising the grown ups that they're going to be.

If you can survive disappointment, nothing can beat you

When you're young as a comic, you don't have a lot of leverage.

I killed my Facebook page years ago because time clicking around is just dead time. Your brain isn't resting and it isn't doing. I think people have to get their heads around this thing. All this unmitigated input is hurting folks.

I like all ladies of all different ages.

A household name is like ketchup. Everybody wants ketchup. Ketchup doesn't hurt anybody.

To me the goal of comedy is to just laugh, which is a really high hearted thing, visceral connection and reaction.