I am exhausted by trying to get along with the Lord.

Shut up Jas, you are not Baby Jesus

Look, I can't go out with you, because... because... because I'm a lesbian.

I am going to become a writer for Cosmo - you don’t have to make any sense at all. Or maybe I’ll be a bloke, they don’t have to make sense either.

You're fourteen years old. You've only had that hair for fourteen years and you want to change it already! How bored are you going to be with it by the time you are thirty? What color will you be up to by then?

I put my arm around her and said, "Jas, I have found that when you are troubled, it is often better to think of others rather than yourself. I think you would feel much better if you got me some milky coffee and jammy dodgers and I told you all about me.

I like the idea that I can talk to any teenage girls. You know, in a language that makes sense to them.