Shakespeare is just some bloke who keeps ranting "what light trough yonder window breaks" its the moon for god sakes!

Watching TV mum said," Do you miss your dad?" And I said," Who?

P.P.S. I am giving you telepathic hugs. P.P.P.S. But not in a telepathically lezzie way.

He came over and ruffled my hair, which is technically assault. I could get on the blower to ChildLine.

You wouldn't say ' You've got the crappest eyes I've ever seen. Your eyes make me physically sick.

He has a song in his heart for me. I hope it is not "Shut Uppa You Face, Whatsa Matta You.

A nod is as good as a wink to a blind badger.