When uncle Eddie does his impression of 'Like a Virgin' it's like Madonna is coming out of his body!' Christ what an image.

I don't know what's going on with Mum and Dad, but it's weird. Mum keeps asking Dad to do things and he keeps doing them Unfotunately, she hasn't said 'Hand over your money and make your way to Europe!

Watching TV mum said," Do you miss your dad?" And I said," Who?

What shall I say? I must tread a fine line between glaciosity and friendlinosity. With just a hint of 'you don't know what you are missing, my fine-feathered friend.

If you fall down those stairs and break both of your legs, don't come running to me!

Shut up Jas, you are not Baby Jesus

This soft grass suggests 'softness' to me, but also at the same time 'lying-down-ness'.