Snooki is really beautiful and looks quite like Elizabeth Taylor in 'Cleopatra.' She has the same bone structure. I'm kind of obsessed with 'Jersey Shore.' People don't give them enough credit for how entertaining they are.

Most conservatives also believe in the death penalty, but not abortion, which proves they like to procrastinate.

Comedy is a noble art.

If we have the opportunity to be generous with our hearts, ourselves, we have no idea of the depth and breadth of love's reach.

Comedy is a noble art. And every comedian who does anything is serving a noble purpose.

The stuff I do and say onstage I can do easily. As a performer, that comes easily. But being social offstage, it's not easy for me.

You have to have a very holler-y sensibility. So they [the audience] know there's something worth listening to.